Wednesday, October 17, 2007

My Horror-scope

I try to keep an open mind about most everything... with what I consider to be a healthy dose of skepticism since I do tend to be rather naive and gullible. I shy away from fortune tellers and their ilk... not so much because I'm afraid they might be wrong or right, but because I'm too cheap to spend the money on what will be anyhow. (Yeah, I do believe in fate...but then I also believe in making my own---see how f'ed-up I am.)

But I just so happen to read my forecase yesterday and it struck me dead on with it's seemingly clear and concise insight into the core of my current situation. Here's how it begins:

"You are not one who particularly likes structure, dear Capricorn, but know that you probably need it more than anyone else."

Have I mentioned I hate...loathed...detest conformity?! I hate the little uniformed townhomes and rebel against couture. Hence the no make-up, short Fantastic Sam's hair cut, and Goodwill clothes (but I draw the line at the European no-frills armpits...armpits must be shaved!).

But knowing I intend to homeschool may have given you some clue to my views on the matter. Anyhoo, I also hated to have to account for my time at home. If I did 5 loads of laundry, took care of my son from sun up to sun down, did the grocery shopping, cleaned 1 and 1/2 bathrooms, cleaned the kitchen, had the dishes washed, vacuumed, and fed the dog (and cleaned after the dog), does it really matter how much time I spend on the compter in the meantime?!

Am I digressing? Sorry, venting they say is good.

Back to the horror-scope topic, I'm nonchalant, I've been told. I know what I have to do and will see to it that it gets done but please don't tell me how to do it or I may just have to take drastic measures like...tune you out.

But, it is clear I recognize my own need to organization...hence my revamping of my books and files, reorganizing the house, creating and printing many forms to help keep my life in order. So, that being said, it was refreshing to see it in black and white. It helped to hit home.k

"Today would be a good one to take an honest look at your life and see what kind of adjustmenst need to be made in order for you to keep it all in control."

Kinda sends shivers up the spine, don't it?!

"Discipline is a key element to this day. Try to stay focused and not get distracted by your fluctuating emotions."


So, I'm taking a step back and taking a closer look at my life.
  • I'm not perfect.
  • I don't have to be perfect.
  • I need to listen to others' "good intentions."
  • Other people may be right some of the time.
  • I don't have to get defensive or offended.
  • I don't have to do things the "right" way.
  • It's okay to do things "my" way.
  • I need to speak out loud what is screaming in my heart.
I've decided I have to worry less about how other people may react to what I am doing. I have to not internalize their anger or disapproval. Easier said than done but at least I have a somewhat working plan. I have to know what I am doing is right for me.

1 comment:

Mrs. Jones said...

Great post. I must be a lot like you, because I don't like structure and I need it so much! Have you ever read The Four Agreements? It reminds me of your list. These are things I have been trying to get better about for years, and it actually sinks in after a while. It is a wonderful way to live.