Thursday, March 13, 2008

Big Britches and Little Butts

Z's gotten such an attitude lately. Yes, we are talking about the same kid here! He thinks he knows it all and tries to correct EVERYONE!! Even perfect strangers. It sounds funny, but it is soooo not. Especially when he asks a question and as you are telling him the answer, he is telling you that you are wrong and he doesn't even know the right answer!! It drives me batty, although I have yet to go grey or pull my hair out.

The kid began recently to regress. Doing all the stuff kids do when they are much younger. Like taking the marker while we are in the car and drawing on his bag (and getting it on his lips). The blue lips we notice just as we are pulling into the parking lot of a restaurant. (So hard not to laugh.) Like opening the paint container on my desk (which he knows better not to touch) which is next to my computer. (I know. Dumb me...but I didn't think he would open it!) Like picking off the googly eyes that we just glued on and saying he did not know picking at them would make them fall off. And while I may have accepted that explanation if only one eye came off, but the kid took off two eyes! That one was not flying.

I had to drag him off during Patches today to have a conversation. He was in such a snotty mood. I asked him if he wanted me to cut his bumble bee wings out for him or if he would like to do it. He just stared at me and had no reply. Then gets in a tizzy about how he has to do the gluing and painting and getting all huffy if I tried to help.

Part of the problem is I'm a softee. I'm not a hitter or a yeller. I'm an occasional time-outter. And I try not to make threats. In my husband's eyes, I am way too soft. And I'd disagree, but Hell, even the dog knows that. Lucy will lick me crazy when she wants a treat. She has trained me well. And now Z is trying too. Thank goodness it's all subconscious. I would be a goner if he really put his mind to it.

I can't tell you how glad I am he is a boy. I don't think I could handle a girl's attitude. At 4 he's got the skills to make my world spin and smoke rise from my ears. The thought of him in 11 years and the battles ahead are enough to make me grab a glass of wine, nevermind the time of day.

Cheers. Here's to parenthood and the neverending battle for dominance. May I win.


Amy said...

They love to test the waters don't they?

Anonymous said...

Laughing my butt off. Just wait mom!

Kim said...

There is no doubt you will win. I thought sleepless nights were the most difficult part of all this?